amansgottadowhat: (Default)
2020-01-20 01:11 am

Concrit

Greetings, all! I have been informed that this is some sort of forum in which I might discuss certain things to you, the lovely, lovely, innocent onlookers. From what I have heard, there's some sort of lady that's 'playing me'.

Now, I will have you know that no one plays Captain Hammer, but I would just love to hear all of my fans' comments on my many, many interviews here in the City, and would like to know how I can better serve you, and how I can improve. Of course, I'm sure that none of you will be too harsh, but all the same, a superhero speaks for the people, and what the people want, they get.

So if you'd all kindly speak your opinions, and then maybe we'll go out and have some good times between us, huh?

And remember, honesty is best!
amansgottadowhat: (Why are you on me?)
2011-12-12 05:54 pm

62-If someone goes a-missin', don't go a-kissin'

[Voice Post]

There have been many times such as these in the past, when people might be inclined to- take advantage of this curse. I, however, will not allow this to transpire. Like every other time before it, I intend to ensure that no one uses this unnecessarily to their advantage.

Hopefully my services shall not be needed.

[/Voice Post]

[OoC: He's done this before with very unpleasant results. Please make this experience equally unpleasant for him. 8| Also, I AM SO SORRY, I THOUGHT IT WAS THE 11TH TODAY. Please to be backdating to yesterday, thank you!]
amansgottadowhat: (Punching in the face of justice!)
2011-11-29 11:57 pm

61-They're at a bit of stand-still

While I understand that these statues are very concerning, they are still capable of being defeated.

I have not succeeded with this, so far, but they can be punched. They do not appear to have any reaction, but if they can be harmed, then they can be defeated. I am still unsure as to how they are moving. The physical attacks to seem to dissuade them significantly, so if anyone is in need of my assistance, I shall be happy to grant it.

However, I would not recommend turning your backs on it.

[OoC: He has tried this before. 8| To about just as equal success.]
amansgottadowhat: (Default)
2011-11-27 11:36 pm

60-What is love? (Baby don't hurt me)

[Accidental Video Post]

[Hammer is sitting in his computer chair, and it is pretty obvious how the post was activated, as he is idly drumming his fingers right next to it. He closes his eyes momentarily, and this is looking to be the most boring post ever, until he starts muttering, admittedly loudly,]

Sam? No. But I- I thought we were going to make it work. I- [muttering muttering, silence, he smiles for a few minutes, and then a frown again.]

Bonnie, you know he isn't anything to me, not like you are. But he needs me. You needed me. How could I- you can't make me choose, it's- [muttering, into silence, slightly shorter than the first silence, and then the smile.]

Julie, I- What? No! How could you! You were supposed to be the one, I can't believe- [and with that assertion, he bangs on the table, startling himself out of the stupor.] Whasni? [He shakes his head, waking himself more.]

[The blinking light appears to have been spotted, and he smiles at the camera, reassuringly.]

I do hope that if this is a curse, it isn't unpleasant for anyone, but I can assure you that nothing in your dreams will harm you. But if you would like further assurance, I will be happy to assist you in any manner possible. [And he turns off the feed.]

[/Video Post]

[OoC: Wilson's montage of marriages and divorces! Via daydreaming. 8D btw, Whasni isn't a word, it's just a 'I've just woken up, what's going on' sound.]
amansgottadowhat: (It's me! I'm so excited.)
2011-10-02 06:50 pm

59-Oh my god, stop saying faces

[Voice Post]

Hello again guests to our city. I'm sure that your familiar faces will only hasten to brighten our days even moreso than getting our color back did. And for those whose faces we've never seen before, your faces shall be the face of some sort of happy expression upon our own faces.

Welcome.

[/Voice Post]

[OoC: Do whatever/say whatever/send whoever! Also watch this, because everyone should watch it. It's amazing and I love him.]
amansgottadowhat: (It's me! I'm so excited.)
2011-09-27 03:09 pm

58-Back to our colorful selves

[Voice Post]

Well well, it seems as though things are back to normal. Undoubtedly thanks to us, as opposed to the deities, hm?

Good job to all. Is there anyone who is still missing any color from the spectrum?

[/Voice Post]

[OoC: Encouraging negative feelings towards the deities? HE WOULD NEV- Okay, maybe a little.]
amansgottadowhat: (My lovely operatic voice)
2011-09-23 12:36 am

57-Color him heroically filled with song

[Voice Post]

Yes, this lack of color is quite distressing. I do suppose that all this grey everywhere is a little different than the usual curses. It is, however, quite upsetting for day-to-day activities.

[And then, in a manner that is both dramatic and upbeat, he begins singing.]

Is the sun really shining, can the sky truly be blue,
when there's simply not color, for any to view?
So tough to get around,
with depleted sight and sound.
And it's tough to see the ground,
when there's no color to be found.
But there is hope for us yet, because there's something we can do.
Yes we can reverse this curse, no need to rehearse this task.
If we can get through the barrier once broken, the lack of color shouldn't make us pity-
because pale-ure is not an option, City.


[/Voice Post]

[OoC: He can't see any colors at all, not yet anyway. I figured he was overdue for a song, but I'm not so happy with this one. Except for that last line. Backdate to Thursday afternoon, thank you~]
amansgottadowhat: (Let me tell you what I know)
2011-08-25 10:49 pm

56-A Horrible departure (and a horrible joke)

[Voice Post]

Anyone who knew, or has heard of Dr. Horrible, I am happy to report that the villain has left the City. I have but two regrets.

One is that I was not able to sufficiently defeat him that he would halt his actions back in my home world.

And the other is that the deities could not leave the City as well, villains that they are.

[/Voice Post]

[OoC: Link not IC. EAST-COASTERS; I'm glad that there were no reported major injuries from the earthquake, but please be careful with the upcoming hurricane. Turn over any outside tables upside down, and turn chairs on their sides, and get anything else that has the potential to be airborne secured somewhere, inside if possible. Do not go out, do not drive, and keep away from windows if you're further South. Keep provisions at hand, and stock up; cold, pre-prepared food is preferable. I hope that you and your loved ones keep safe.]
amansgottadowhat: (Guess what these are not)
2011-07-26 11:57 pm

55-Only thing he's fighting now is irritibility

[Video Post]

[Hammer is only slightly more disheveled than some others might be on this day, but his eyes are the most un-masked of anything. There are bags, yes, but any kindness or sympathy that might otherwise be there is dwindling, if there at all.]

Horrible. Thought the City should know. Horrible is here. Doctor Horrible he calls himself. He's a self-proclaimed villain. Someone to look out for. [He blinks a few times, and almost jolts opening his eyes on the slightly-longer last blink.] Beware.

Hopefully this curse is only one day. People need sleep in order to combat evil.

[/Video Post]
amansgottadowhat: (Punching in the face of justice!)
2011-07-06 05:41 pm

54-Alright, but, even so, it's still pretty cool, right?

[Text Post]

olmdsknogewindsbkm

[Voice Post]

[There seems to be a fan on or wind in the background, as there's a constant whooshing sound.]

My apologies, [Whoosh.] I can't seem, [Whoosh.] to get a handle, [Whoosh.] on my network device, [Whoosh.] today. [Whoosh.] Allow me, [Whoosh.] to attempt, [Whoosh.] video. [WHOOSH.]

[After a few more moments of whooshing, there's also a slamming sound and the video turns on.]

[Video Post]

[And the reason for the whooshing is evident. He is in a constant state of punching; left, right, left, right. Currently he's punching the air, but then as he begins speaking, he turns to punch a pillow instead, the entire. Time. He's speaking.]

It appears that while, in some manner, my journey yesterday was successful, it did not exactly yield to the desired results. Some might say that it backfired on me. I am trying to contain myself to me apartment so that I do not accidentally inflict pain on any of you. From what I managed to see from the network, it appears that I am not the only one that has this problem today. Let it be said that I apologize for what's afflicting so many of you.

However, I must say, I really gave her a good one.

[/Video Post]

[OoC: He's in his apartment, but let him have it for daring to punch a deity.]
amansgottadowhat: (But mine is the Hammer!)
2011-07-05 02:09 pm

53-I'll get out 'if it kills me' is a bit too dramatic; 'if it gets me punched' is better

[Action Post]

[Hammer runs- no, a better word would be charges- charges through the streets and up to a familiar building. The building that holds the deities' office. It comes of as much a surprise to anyone when he bursts through the first set of doors without any problem, or any sort of hired help blocking the way. In fact, as he ascends through the building, he hardly seems to encounter any sort of troubles at all, save for the fact that something is making him angrier and angrier as he goes along.

It is noon, after all. Even deities' employees need a lunch break.

It should be obvious when he reaches his goal; THE OFFICE OF THE CITY DEITIES is written in fancy lettering on the door that is otherwise the same as every other door he's passed. He opens it as effortlessly as the front door of building itself. There are a variety of figures standing around. The closest one, dressed in a white suit, idly sucking on what looks to be a cigarette speaks first.]

What the fuck does this look like? A barn?

I was promised that my wishes would be granted to me if I retrieved the items from the other worlds. And yet I still seem to be here.

[Next, an older looking man with glasses, snappily dressed.]

I think you have failed to recognize an inherent flaw in your understanding of this set of circumstances.  You want cause and effect.  Well, re-examine your narrative.

Additionally, there was a promise of return home to the one who gathered the most items. And yet I still seem to be here. Why is that?

[Now a brunette. Loud.]

Wah Wah WAH. That is all that Lina is hearing! I do not care for this noise din uproar. GO AWAY. Shoo!

I came to retrieve my prize, and if I do not, I will not hesitate to take action.

[A wild-looking woman with white hair who has sunglasses donned, despite the fact she's indoors.]

Mr. Hammer is rude! Loud spongy fusty cantankerous beetle-headed bovine-eyed butter-face!

[And that seems to really get under Hammer's skin. Saying only:] I warned you,[before reaching over and punching the speaker in the side of the face.

At first she looks like she might cry, but then it quickly turns to shock, and then anger as she, with seemingly no effort at all, lands a fist on his chest that sends him flying across the room. She grins, satisfied, and then blows on her knuckles, a job well done.]

[OoC: More details here! Mod-approved. Hammer is in regular text, and the others are Bertol, Laszlo, Lina, and finally, this is Mouse. This is an action-only post, but if you want to have seen Hammer or heard some commotion in the office, or want to yell at him because of the repercussions, feel free to comment here.]
amansgottadowhat: (Of course! I'm awesome.)
2011-06-30 06:19 pm

52- And all of us are very special in our own ways; some more than others

[Accidental Video/Action Post]

[He is in a scout's hat, and positively bursting at the seams.]

Alright, children, now today we have a new friendly face to add to our group, the? [One or two of the kids mumble something, Hammer saying it with them.] Chipper Cheerful Children, that's right! Now, he's going to be here for the rest of the summer, so let's give him our Chipper Cheerful Cheer!

[Hammer steps aside to reveal Nathan, who has been making faces that do not imply 'friendly', and the group gives a smattering of claps, about three each.]

So, welcome, Nathan! I'm sure you'll enjoy being a part of our group as much as we'll enjoy having you be a part of our group. Now, who's ready for arts and crafts?!

[/Video/Action Post]

[OoC: Cursed as a terribly cheerful counselor that just wants to bake a cake of happiness and sunshine and feed it to everyone. Also, he has normal-human strength, because I'm not having him kill anyone accidentally. His kids are middle school age, which means they're not as impressed as younger kids, and twice as nasty as older kids. 8) [livejournal.com profile] immortaltwat is the CIT of the group, or assistant counselor for parole purposes.

CAMP ANAWANNA.]
amansgottadowhat: (There's plenty of me to go around)
2011-06-19 12:03 am

51-His hopes aren't the only thing being raised

[Voice Post]

Well, well, look who decided to surprise us! Quite a treat at the end of such a perilous week. You all are raising my hope for good things to come.

But of course, what could be better than such wonderful visitors?

[/Voice Post]

[OoC: So cute you could eat them up? Bad jokes aside, this is one hilarious thirty-second video. ANYTHING GOES, he's soon to be in a terrible mood anyway.]
amansgottadowhat: (Guess what these are not)
2011-06-14 06:53 pm

50-Close, yet nowhere near any kind of yellow phallic fruit

[Video Post]

[He is looking a little more disheveled than usual, more tired and unhappy. Until he focuses the camera on him, then behind him, to a (once) beautiful Santa Monica scene. And he grins.]

Well, well. It looks like that message about collecting items is working. Only two days and already I'm back home. Obviously not home home, as I still have access to the network and I see many faces of the City- [His face droops a bit for the previously sentence, before perking up at the end of it.] but it's a good effort, I think.

This- [He once again turns the camera towards the scene.] This is Los Angelos, greatest city on Earth, or any other galaxy; and it is mine. These are the streets I clean of crime, this is air that is inhaled with freedom, these are the people filled with such hope and joy- [An ambling man, approaches slowly, and then lets out a RRRRGH. Hammer turns directly towards him, and all you can see from the angle is a fist coming out and punching the rotted face straight through, before the rest of the body falls to the ground, lifeless.]

This is not the LA that I know. [He turns the camera back on him, smile gone, disgust apparent, and as he speaks he tries to non-obviously shake the gore from his hand.] Dilapidated streets they may be, but I still know them better than the back of my hand- the back of my glove. If anyone needs assistance navigating them, along with security, I am at the ready. Merely tell me where you are.

We shall locate gasoline and leave immediately. Hopefully for good.

[/Video Post]
amansgottadowhat: (Let me tell you what I know)
2011-05-30 11:01 pm

49-Alternatively a male prostitute

[Action/Video Post]

[See Hammer. See Hammer in the Square. See Hammer in the Square with a sign that reads, WILL BE STRONG FOR MONEY.

You'd probably be best just continuing on with your day.]

[/Action/Video Post]
amansgottadowhat: (Comedy is just my side-job)
2011-05-18 11:50 pm

48-Internal views of Captain Hammer; the not squishy or gross kind

[Video Post]

And here we have the very impressive Captain Hammer. Thank you for speaking with me, Captain.

Non-IC LJ-cut )

[/Video Post]

[Text Post]

I can't imagine what happened, all of a sudden he said he had another appointment and rushed off like the dickens! Oh well, another time, perhaps.

[/Text Post]

[OoC: Blue=interviewer, normal text=Hammer.]
amansgottadowhat: (But mine is the Hammer!)
2011-05-15 06:59 pm

47-Not a medium, more like a large ham

[Video Post]

[He is standing proudly in front of the camera as he does nearly every time he makes a post. He does look a little less arrogant today, but still full of pride.]

Citizens, I feel that it has been some time since the infestation of the harpies, and yet there is still a lingering threat in the air. It may just be another of their curses, but I am feeling a bit different today. I would not claim to not feel myself, because I am now, and always will be me. Captain Hammer. Superhero.

[As he continues on, a fly buzzes lazily near the top of the video feed, and even it looks bored and unimpressed.]

However, I feel a general uneasiness. I feel it getting closer and closer, until it's so close that I could grab it. [At the word, he snatches the fly from the air. He grins into the camera dramatically, but then he looks down at the floor and nearly jumps back.]

What are you? [He remembers himself for a moment and straightens up.] And what are you doing in my house!? [He reaches over, his eyes betraying his disgust, and turns off the video.]

[/Video Post]

[OoC: Power switched with Antimony Carver from Gunnerkrigg Court!]
amansgottadowhat: (It's me! I'm so excited.)
2011-03-20 12:30 am

46-I'm not a hero, but I'm, like, totally super!

[Video Post]

The feed comes on, and- well, it kind of looks like Hammer, but there are noticable differences. Like the outfit, for one, which isn't her usually attire. Oh, and the fact that you just subconsciously used the pronoun 'her'. Because those are most definitely a set of breasts. While the top that 'Hammer' is wearing isn't exactly skimpy, it's certainly not quite covering all. When Hammer speaks, it is in a female, somewhat squeaky voice that seems to imply the the speaker is better than you.

"So, like, I don't know what's going on, but there's totally something weird going on. And I don't know where my guys've gone? But, like, I was totally supposed to meet a group at the Cafe earlier today? And, like, they didn't show. And no one shows me up. Well, at least, they never have before. Unless it's got to do with the curse? Which I'm assuming it is? Because that's, like, totally got to be the only explanation." Hair flip.

"So, anyway, I'm totally free now. If any of you cuties want to take me out to make up for this afternoon."

[/Video Post]

[OoC: Haha, I am a bitch. Also, this is late because of Purim. Woo, celebration! Also, her name is totally Naila. I looked it up, it's Arabic, and while it's pronounced Nah-ee-lah, she'll be pronouncing it Nail-a. Because she would-a like-a to nail-a you. And Hammer's pretty politically incorrect as a guy, anyway. So apparently that and his promiscuity is staying! Also, if your character knows him, I'm playing him as though they're meeting for the first time, on his part.]