When you're the best

[Text Post]

olmdsknogewindsbkm

[Voice Post]

[There seems to be a fan on or wind in the background, as there's a constant whooshing sound.]

My apologies, [Whoosh.] I can't seem, [Whoosh.] to get a handle, [Whoosh.] on my network device, [Whoosh.] today. [Whoosh.] Allow me, [Whoosh.] to attempt, [Whoosh.] video. [WHOOSH.]

[After a few more moments of whooshing, there's also a slamming sound and the video turns on.]

[Video Post]

[And the reason for the whooshing is evident. He is in a constant state of punching; left, right, left, right. Currently he's punching the air, but then as he begins speaking, he turns to punch a pillow instead, the entire. Time. He's speaking.]

It appears that while, in some manner, my journey yesterday was successful, it did not exactly yield to the desired results. Some might say that it backfired on me. I am trying to contain myself to me apartment so that I do not accidentally inflict pain on any of you. From what I managed to see from the network, it appears that I am not the only one that has this problem today. Let it be said that I apologize for what's afflicting so many of you.

However, I must say, I really gave her a good one.

[/Video Post]

[OoC: He's in his apartment, but let him have it for daring to punch a deity.]

[Accidental Video/Action Post]

[He is in a scout's hat, and positively bursting at the seams.]

Alright, children, now today we have a new friendly face to add to our group, the? [One or two of the kids mumble something, Hammer saying it with them.] Chipper Cheerful Children, that's right! Now, he's going to be here for the rest of the summer, so let's give him our Chipper Cheerful Cheer!

[Hammer steps aside to reveal Nathan, who has been making faces that do not imply 'friendly', and the group gives a smattering of claps, about three each.]

So, welcome, Nathan! I'm sure you'll enjoy being a part of our group as much as we'll enjoy having you be a part of our group. Now, who's ready for arts and crafts?!

[/Video/Action Post]

[OoC: Cursed as a terribly cheerful counselor that just wants to bake a cake of happiness and sunshine and feed it to everyone. Also, he has normal-human strength, because I'm not having him kill anyone accidentally. His kids are middle school age, which means they're not as impressed as younger kids, and twice as nasty as older kids. 8) immortaltwat is the CIT of the group, or assistant counselor for parole purposes.

CAMP ANAWANNA.]

[Video Post]

[He is looking a little more disheveled than usual, more tired and unhappy. Until he focuses the camera on him, then behind him, to a (once) beautiful Santa Monica scene. And he grins.]

Well, well. It looks like that message about collecting items is working. Only two days and already I'm back home. Obviously not home home, as I still have access to the network and I see many faces of the City- [His face droops a bit for the previously sentence, before perking up at the end of it.] but it's a good effort, I think.

This- [He once again turns the camera towards the scene.] This is Los Angelos, greatest city on Earth, or any other galaxy; and it is mine. These are the streets I clean of crime, this is air that is inhaled with freedom, these are the people filled with such hope and joy- [An ambling man, approaches slowly, and then lets out a RRRRGH. Hammer turns directly towards him, and all you can see from the angle is a fist coming out and punching the rotted face straight through, before the rest of the body falls to the ground, lifeless.]

This is not the LA that I know. [He turns the camera back on him, smile gone, disgust apparent, and as he speaks he tries to non-obviously shake the gore from his hand.] Dilapidated streets they may be, but I still know them better than the back of my hand- the back of my glove. If anyone needs assistance navigating them, along with security, I am at the ready. Merely tell me where you are.

We shall locate gasoline and leave immediately. Hopefully for good.

[/Video Post]

[Video Post]

And here we have the very impressive Captain Hammer. Thank you for speaking with me, Captain.

( Non-IC LJ-cut )

[/Video Post]

[Text Post]

I can't imagine what happened, all of a sudden he said he had another appointment and rushed off like the dickens! Oh well, another time, perhaps.

[/Text Post]

[OoC: Blue=interviewer, normal text=Hammer.]

[Video Post]

The feed comes on, and- well, it kind of looks like Hammer, but there are noticable differences. Like the outfit, for one, which isn't her usually attire. Oh, and the fact that you just subconsciously used the pronoun 'her'. Because those are most definitely a set of breasts. While the top that 'Hammer' is wearing isn't exactly skimpy, it's certainly not quite covering all. When Hammer speaks, it is in a female, somewhat squeaky voice that seems to imply the the speaker is better than you.

"So, like, I don't know what's going on, but there's totally something weird going on. And I don't know where my guys've gone? But, like, I was totally supposed to meet a group at the Cafe earlier today? And, like, they didn't show. And no one shows me up. Well, at least, they never have before. Unless it's got to do with the curse? Which I'm assuming it is? Because that's, like, totally got to be the only explanation." Hair flip.

"So, anyway, I'm totally free now. If any of you cuties want to take me out to make up for this afternoon."

[/Video Post]

[OoC: Haha, I am a bitch. Also, this is late because of Purim. Woo, celebration! Also, her name is totally Naila. I looked it up, it's Arabic, and while it's pronounced Nah-ee-lah, she'll be pronouncing it Nail-a. Because she would-a like-a to nail-a you. And Hammer's pretty politically incorrect as a guy, anyway. So apparently that and his promiscuity is staying! Also, if your character knows him, I'm playing him as though they're meeting for the first time, on his part.]