When you're the best

Citizens! I am very pleased to see that all of what's been happening seems to have been dying down. Who knew that baked goods could be so helpful? And I do hope that all of you are safe after yesterday. If anyone is in need of assistance, I will, of course, be happy to help.

And speaking of helping! I'm sure you all have noticed these little announcements? And a fabulous job well done to Penny, indeed.

However, I propose another idea to help. Every day we deal with this name, and we always complain about it. I believe it is time for a change! In name, to be specific. It's time for the City to be known by another moniker. What say you? Who comes bearing suggestions?

[OoC: Yeah, we'll see where this goes? Also, in fandom-related news, *rips off moustache* Whedon!]

[Voice Post]

Well, this weekend proved to be quite interesting. A little bit of a different sort of wetness than I'm used to; not quite the tail I'd been hoping to get, and a little inconvenient, but not bad, overall.

I would like to, however, address this ridiculous essay business now. The first one was easily ignorable and if you want to submit yourselves to that sort of risk and thinking it is no concern of mine.

But this? It is a MOCKERY! Write about pain? Perhaps if you do not meet their 'expectations' they will cause you pain. Perhaps even if you do. My suggestion is that this is one you err very cautiously if you decide to participate in it. Although maybe I should try. I might even hand in a little something to test the waters, so to speak. If you find yourself needing assistance, I will be glad to give it to you. Just contact me.

[/Voice Post]

[Deity filter]

Pain is something that you make happen to other people. To inflict pain is a way of asserting that you will not be stopped. Pain is used as a tool all over. Pain can be used to stop someone else from causing pain to a third party. Or from yourself. Pain is defense, pain is offense. Pain lets someone know when they have crossed the line, and gives them the knowledge to know that they should never do it again, lest you give them more pain. Pain is power. Pain is not something I experience.

[OoC: He was a hammerhead shark. 8B Not that you'd really be able to tell; his upper half was the same, but how could I not? Link IC. Strikes not there. Edit: I edited the entry a little; I'm not trying to get out of any hard questions or interactions, I swear! I just was thinking on it today and I hated how it came out. D: My apologies.]

[Video Post]

Hammer stands in front of the video, and there is a sheep standing barely off-screen. "Greetings. As most of you are aware of by now, there is an infestation of unheard proportions. The sheep appear to be related to the series of curses from last month, when we were given the option to kill them to save ourselves." The sheep wanders closer to the camera, all the while chewing on some grass, appearing to find Hammer intriguing, as it precedes to stare at him, unblinkingly.

"Some of the sheep out there have a te-ndency to bite," if you listen carefully, you will notice that there was a little bit of a strain in his voice, or a trick of the recording, "and their bites have proven to be dangerous. If your friend has been bitten, please quarantine them, and make sure that you are safe. I-" he glances at the sheep, "will assist anyone who needs assistance. I am off for now."

As he turns off the camera, the sheep lets out a bleat.

[/Video Post]

[OoC: He didn't kill a sheep, and that's not a curse-sheep, but it's staaaaaring at him, cause he was two seconds from killing one.]

[Video Post]

When the camera turns on, there is just a hammer lying in the line of sight. Is that Captain Hammer? No, because a few seconds later he appears on-screen absolutely covered in hammers. Plastic, metal and wood, mechanical, even inflatable. "This, is not amusing."

I have known many a Jew back home over the course of my life. From what I gather of this holiday that they have, what's upcoming is not pretty. There is much talk about these sheep roaming around and what needs to be done in order to protect oneself.

I, of course, would not be participating, as I don't believe in any of this, but as a hero, if any of you so desire to be shielded by the so-called protection of the blood, I will do it, and allow you to hold lodging in my apartment. Just say the word, and it shall be done.

[OoC: For the love of god, someone please stop him from literally tearing open a sheep. He is seriously freaking out on the inside.]